It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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