Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize