ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
