maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
