So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I just googled if crying burns calories
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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