i think my tv is drunk
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize