Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
