Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize