Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
