omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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