R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
