So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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