Pants 0. Shit 1.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
