I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Randomize
