Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
jump out the window naked night went bad
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
