I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize