i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
