Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize