Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
