After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
They have beer where we have blood.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize