Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
