was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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