How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I believe in your delicious
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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