so that wasnt chicken after all
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
