Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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