I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
organizing the empties. That sober.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
They took my balls.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I can't put those talents on a resume
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
