Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
