I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
