considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
