margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
