I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
