just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize