Moan for me like Helen Keller
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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