yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize