yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize