We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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