The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Woke up backwards on a recliner
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
