She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
