i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
