He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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