shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Randomize
