Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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