How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
