Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Randomize
