I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
