it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I need to sanitize my soul.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize