Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
