They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize