That's intense
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
