Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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