Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
