Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
he puts the penis in happiness.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
